Q & A: How do I manage?

Q. Laura said:

You'll have to share your secrets of how you manage to look good while juggling kids and house. I haven't figured it out yet. I try to get up earlier than the baby, but pretty soon, I find myself setting the alarm for 3:30 a.m. because as soon as I'm awake, she's awake and then my day belongs to her. The past two weeks she's been in this don't-leave-my-sight-or-let-me-out-of-your-arms-or-i'll-die-or-at-least-scream-for-hours-loud-enough-that-you'll-think-i'm-dying phase. very few morning showers have occured due to this. I've been sporting the "Just Left the Delivery Room" look for 7 months now. I do manage a shower most mornings, but that's about all she'll let me do. I get dressed to the background noise of screaming. Somehow, makeup just doesn't seem all that important if it's to be done with that kind of accompaniment. So how do you manage?

A. First, you have my sympathies. I well-remember those days when I had to carry my daughter in the baby sling just to do some dishes, lest she scream like a banshee. It was so hard and overwhelming that I'd just sit and cry. But this too will pass. My babies are now 7 and almost-10 and not only do I now have time for dishwashing but I have two helpers washing and drying with me. Just do the best you can each day. Everything is harder with a little baby. If you manage to get a shower, dress, brush you hair & teeth, and eat, you're doing well.

I always took my babies in the shower with me because that was the only way I could get a shower. I just always made sure not to carry them out of the wet tub lest I slip. Sometimes my husband would watch the babies while I got a quick shower by myself but that was usually on the weekends. Some choose to shower at night but I just don't like to do that.

If you don't already, you could lay everything out at night, while she's sleeping, for the next day. I mean everything: undergarments, clothes ready to wear, shoes, earrings, lipstick - the whole shebang. It really helps you get ready quickly. I only wear make-up when I go out but I like to wear earrings and lipstick or lip gloss every day to make me feel more put together. I always wear shoes, too. It makes me feel prepared. If I need to, I'm all dressed and ready to go.

When my second baby was born, we paid a friend's pre-teen daughter to come over in the afternoons and help me a little. The pay wasn't much and she didn't do much either but it is amazing how much just having a second pair of hands and eyes can help.

Like I said, just do the best you can and remember that this is just a season and it will pass. It gets much better, I promise you.